Sunday, August 31, 2003
i tried to save some pics from ohana msn but com cant read leh...haiz... anyway tis friday will be the society;s dinner...was at yishun today to tie some ends...b4 tat went to the restaurant to tok to the boss...i like him...he gave us alot of pointers...heez..mayb he last time also start from small so he understand n helped us in alot of ways... if onli evryone was like tat...but at least finally now all matters abt the dinner is solved... finally can fang sia xin to study...heez... tmr go amk library with anna...hope to be able to study n get tings into my barin...if not jiu die laioz.... good nitez bloggie... sweet dreamz...
blogged at 11:11 PM
today tried to post some stuff but...haiz...cable someting wrong...keep on d/c me frm the net...haiz... anyway here r more results... heez..
Ichi - "That one with wisdom"
Sponsored by www.life-blood.cjb.net
What would your Japanese name be? (female) brought to you by Quizilla
bubbly: you are a super nice person and you have
lots of friends. often classed as miss popular,
sometimes your popularity can go to your head
and your hidden bitchiness sometimes shows
itself. apart from that, you are pretty,
stylish and sweet, most girls want to be you
and most boys want to date you. you have a
heart of gold and although you aren't the
smartest person around, you are one of the most
caring.
what kind of girl are you? brought to you by Quizilla
You're A School Girl!
You may not get the best grades, but you'll always
be found sporting your sleek school uniform.
You've got school spirit, and lots of it!
Pocket PCs and Pocky can be found in your
backpack, and you love cute stuffed animals
like teddy bears and bunnies!
What Type Of Anime Character Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
You are Aurora from Sleeping Beauty!
What Disney Princess are you? brought to you by Quizilla
YOU ARE MARRIED TO A WoODCHUCK!!!
what's YOUR deepest secret? brought to you by Quizilla
innocent kiss - you're cute and sweet and like it
that way
What Sign of Affection Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
Neutral:
Harmony and balance is key. You don't look at the
world in a negative or positive way and you'll
never judge or assume a situation- you just
look at the facts. People like you are peaceful
and accepting.
Made by
Sara
What color do you see the world in? brought to you by Quizilla
You are Love.
You love life, you love all those around you and
the world that you live in. You are happiest
when you are doing something for someone else
or for the common good of mankind.
What Emotion Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
blogged at 10:09 PM
the quizilla reali alot of quizes sia...heez...but dun tink will post all results here....heez...her's another one...
The Lost Soul
What sign of the Black Zodiac are you? brought to you by Quizilla
looks pretty bleak huh.... haiz...now like no motivation to study yet.... y m i so restless? i always see u worrying over the bills and expenses...when i look at ur back it shows fatigue and fear... i reallly hope i can do someting abt tis...but ... i cant even handle myself...the one ting i can do is just to cut down on my expenses... i m sure there will b a better tmr... cos u have always been supporting us since the day i was born... thank you dad even though u may not see tis... but i m really glad u n mum brought me to tis world...to let me know wat's it's like out tere.. letting me have a chance to learn...and to be able to change...for the better if not worse... heez...
blogged at 12:12 PM
Saturday, August 30, 2003
You are the hidden beauty
Which Ultimate Beautiful Woman are You? brought to you by Quizilla
i saw tis quiz at anna there...heez..
blogged at 1:06 AM
haiz...here i m again...now watching the WE wilber n energy celebration show..heez...anyway, today was sports lor...bathe in sch...the water real cold...but v song..heez...then lost, so me n wilmer went to buy dinner for all..went till bishan...saw someone familiar at j8..i went n and take closer look...yuan lai zhen de is last time garry tat gang ppl...haha...they also dun remember me liaoz...i tink so i just walk past them...they all like v kan cheong...wonder wat hapen...haiz...
on the way to and back bishan, me n wilmer tok abt alot of tings...v long never tok like tat liaoz...like is tok abt life wiewpoints n stuff...not crap...haha.. but seriously tinking... y didi i tok so much...haha... cos i will die if i dun...haha..maybe the best training for me is to make myself go for silence training for abt 1 day...haha.. i tink tat is enuff to kill me...
actuali got alot to tell u wan...but... i duno how to phrase... i remember b4 i had u i will always go to esplanade and just sit/ stand and watch the singapore river...tink on all tots....and later i will feel alot more better...
common test coming...die liaoz ah...hafnt start studying...hope can pia in a week...like v impossible though..tmr cooking jap curry and udon...heez..
blogged at 1:00 AM
Friday, August 29, 2003
bloggie ah... i told myself no more net...but i m here again...haiz...i tink reali becoming addiction....cham liaoz.... it ink they all won money over the match...duno leh...today after sch i went to buy some stuf...mum change my bed sheets for me...so i cooked dinner tonite...tried to copy the vegetarian stall the way the guy did the veg....but failed terribly...
today wilmer tot of an idea for the productivity..involves crab though..haha...i tink if try should be he n cuijie try...i dun touch stuff stuff liaoz mah...heez..
anyway today noting much reali happened...just tat saw another nkf card again..tis time is jon's one...wonder y dun they just save the money n go n help the patient...waste the money on all tis cards...mayb they tink tat with the card can get more $ but must invest abit first? hehe..
tot of printing society stuff in sch...either in qwek lab or autocad room...but tmr we already going to print marketing in autocad liaoz... so i tink i beter just print out a copy n go photocopy ba...beter tis way...
i d/l back kazaa lite...heez..ealise tat cant really depend on lone for mp3...they cant supply me machi didi and some other guys songs...heez...haiz...wait for warning letter ba...haha...
oh ya... today i lied...haiz... bcos of the maths paper....haiz...i dun like lying to ppl i like...as in like frens or classmates.. today mich n i went to print the maths paper..then wee hock saw me take the paper into the ltq...then he jiu ask liaoz..is it maths apper...i say yah...then sit down lioaz... wilmer say cant give them...i walk to the lib is not to print for them wan..then he keep the paper... end of the day wee hock they all four approach me..with me was
wilmer....i feel so bad...haiz...he say its not with him....then i say tat i come back onli the paper i just throw...i dunno hu took...then they say they got no cash card... i felt like passing them my cash card... all eight eyes staring at me is not a v good feeling...haiz...i tot since young we have been tot to shar n care for others...y when we grow older...all must change?its like it is beter to be selfish...i know i cant change everyone thinking...but if one starts to care and share, i m sure the others will too...its a linking ting... maybe it should start from ME..heez... i remember last time got tis sharity elephant...heez... wonder if can get the pic...haha....put in msn...
today mich told me tat in huiyi blog she say tat she took the foto slowly is to see us get wet...next time make her wet too..heez..mich says after common test go bugis fountain destress...i anyting...but must bring windbreaker..haha..wonder if now i ask u to come along will u come with me? but u got to bring windbreaker for me...haha.... i know u wun liaoz... got ur ger to take care of mah...i wish u all the best... buddha bless..
blogged at 12:48 AM
Thursday, August 28, 2003
just reach home...now is already past 12....the meeting drag on...haiz....so i m home late.... just now half way thru the meeting huiyi called me...she say jesse wan the pressure report...ask if i have... i tell her i not at home...then suddenly 2nd line...its jesse...i tell him i not at home...ask if he can wait...but i duno wat time i will be home...then suddenly he say qing yuan also have rite?i say yah...i tink so... liews then mayb in the first place should not have call me...haiz...interupt me in the meeting... then when i go back i duno wat they tokking laioz.... arghhhh.....
then i sms k guy say jesse wans pressure process report...i refer him to u...cos i now outside... sometimes i wonder, isit i last time hang ard too much with guys in sec sch now no guys fate...haha.. but somehow come poly liaoz...the guys r like treat me transparent...haha...but mayb transparent is beta ba....
oh ya...bloggie, today i got my common test time table...n it sucks to the core...chamz liaoz...seriously speaking i have not been studying for the past few weeks....tis time duno how...mayb use common test to see how the final year qns r like ...but tis way my commmon test sure will sucks to the core wan lor...like tat duno will pass anot...siaoz liaoz...duno hwo to study sia...all the maths...differsation n intergration..all so chim...i dun seem to understand a ting...heat n mass is like the tutorial some times qwek explain till face green green i also still dun understand...but see he like v jia lat explaining to me...i just say i noe...haiz...liek tat actuali is harm myself onli...but i cant slow the class just bcoz onli i dun understand rite? haizzzzzzzzzzz.......
the marketing report....i do so long then the lec say tat i not doing wat she wanted...kaoz....i do for so long...after leave xm... i never really do compo liaoz wor... but at least abit last time standard come back...heez...but not all... haiz...tink pah will kill me if he knows abt tis...heez i miss him..esp in the black n yellow shirt...look like winnie the pooh...in the bee costume...i still remember his loud shout 4E6 WAKE UP!WAKE UP!WAKE UP! wah darn heng he never pao bi in front of us...if not i tink we will all be guilty for our live...but he's really good teacher...i still remember how kan cheong cawley was after mr pah finished shouting....then cawley told us tat mr pah actuali got health prob...cant get too ji dong, or he might just bao pi n die in front of us...tat was when the fear of losing one u love came to me agian...it is so sad....
today shiying tell me tat her fren tio fine for d/l tings at kazaa...haiz...riaa ah...i tink with all the fines tat u have been issuing, u can stop liaoz wah....even the artistes are coming out to support p2p...at least let ppl review b4 they want to buy the cd anot mah...if not can let them pay a minium sum to previw wat....like tat fine n fine for wat.....one cd sell so ex...no wonder ppl rather d/l n burn....heez... :X
today i read i mag...energy in the front cover...then last page is they quote ppl say one... first one is fann wong... she says as the days goes by, u will realise tat wheether ppl like u anot is actuali not impt...okie okie... i noe i hate her...but i guess tis is true....tis is life....haha...
then got another one by some guy called leslie kee a photographer singapore wan... he say believe in ur dreams just tat is enuff to make u happy... actuali even just to believe in wat u r dreaming requires courage...heez...
ok...dun tink i will edit tis entry anymore... like addiction like tat...now everyday must tok to you...die liaoz lah.... anyway my common test how...haiz....
blogged at 12:40 AM
Wednesday, August 27, 2003
There is no remedy for love but to love more.
The past cannot be changed, the future is still in your power.
Love, like a river, will cut a new path whenever it meets an obstacle.
Don't let today's disappointments cast a shadow on tomorrow's dreams.
blogged at 1:21 AM
some tings i found:
When I knelt down and gave the tree a present it said Thank-you then asked me why. I said, because you give me joy. But I am a shabby tree, he said. No, I told him, you are beautiful.
Today the sun was out and smiling just like me. It felt like Spring - not just because it was warm but because there was a sense of blooming. It made me jump very high.
The wind was extra fierce and stormy today and blew me right off my feet. At first I was scared until I realised that I love to fly.
Today felt like winter so I bundled up in my favourite wooly blue hat, my little grey gloves and shoes. I hate the cold, but it gives me rosey cheeks.
What should it matter, I used to think, what others thought? Who are they to say I can't feel beautiful or be happy or change my name to Laura? Who says they are it and get to define who I am. It wasn't that I thought I was better or more beautiful than they were, on the contrary, it's just that I was OK with liking what I liked. I knew I was here to live my life and not the imagined one of others.
When we lack proper time for the simple pleasures of life, for the enjoyment of eating, drinking, playing, creating, visiting friends, and watching children at play, then we have missed the purpose of life. Not on bread alone do we live but on all these human and heart-hungry luxuries.
blogged at 1:04 AM
Tuesday, August 26, 2003
today is such a fun day...Firstly, when we got to the seoul garden the supervisor told us tat they were closed for the day haiyo like tat zi xiao his first customer...so bad.. but he not bad..still help us calculate how much a person pay soon after I pay, huiyi pass me money liaoz...
we started to eat n eat...haha..and we played with food...anna played with her chocolate ice cream,we even took a photo of the product...haha... look like comical shit...haiyo...the chocolate ice cream already so limited still play...haiz...then also took pic of wat they fried for me...heez.. actuali it tasted ok...
then we went to toilet leaving anna in seoul garden eating her ice cream when we went back, all the stuff was cleared...haha...so fast... then suddenly i tot of the time went i was in xm...we used to hang ard bugis...duno for wat also...i remember u said u were here bcoz i m here..haha..bcoz once i start playing in the fountain i will forget everyting...now then i realise wat u said was true...when i play, i will forget abt the others ard me... i remember the time we all got wet n u passed me ur windbreaker cos u said i will get cold easily...today whe i played in the fountain, i tot of u...
i tink today highlight was the fountain...we played realli happily...first to be wet was me n wilmer...but we siamz quickly...at first anna din get wet...i tot she dun like to get wet one...turn out tat she never play at the bugis fountain b4..so kinda shy i guess but later all of us like siaoz liaoz sia....me let the photos do teh tokking ba...i tink will see the fotos soon...
then we walked out to take the bus down to havelock...cuijie need to go borders buy her club ting...we snapped alot of pic at the bus top...like tourist...wilmer then suggested me n huiyi take pic...she like v bu gan yuan take...later on the way home... cuijie say tat the foto like v mien qiang...haiz...not willing wan mah...but i have tot tings out..if a horse refuse to drink water u cant force it to deink...guess its the same for tis...since she dun like me there is simply noting i can...cant force her to like/accept me rite?
after we were wet, se just kept saying dun go near her...she dun wana b wet....say she need to teach tuition later on...today cuijie also got teach tuition..
today me wear the steal chicken baggies...so v long...i kept pulling it up...cos floor dirty...then i say i know i not shu nu... duno who ask if wear skirt how?i said i will also pull it up lor... then huiyi showed me some pic of i tink is her when she was young and tell me tat is then shu nu...i say erm...that is like when u young lor..she say she will also dare to wear now...n say loudly tat she will wear it tmr...pink dress... haiz... i discover someting... never anyhow say anyting...esp when u noe tat u will regret... then later she say no she will not...then kena suanz by ohana....i wonder if she will wear like tat tmr...dress
sia...heez....
then later at borders got one auntie the button fly was undone...anna called me n say tell the auntie...haiyo...so pai seh how to tell? erm...auntie ni de la lian mei you la? auntie i can see ur front? auntie u come out too fast from the toilet isit? how to say?all will be pai seh wan lor....haiz...
the day finally ended...i feel so tired...haiz.... but i wanan watch the jacky wu show leh....heez.... cham liaoz...whole day onli tok to u, bloggie n watch tv...sure die ah...like tat...common test.... i tink i can onli aim final year liaoz....haiz...also duno aim de dao mah...
anyway today holland v show tat tianyang n rou rou noe tat they r half siblings...so sad.... nearly cried for them... wonders if it really happens in real life...really got so coincidence?
just saw a very er xin email...is show tat some woman went on some expedtion or watever then got larvae growing in her breast...got pic somemore...looks so gross...like got blueberries in it...its like embedded in it...so gross..n it cause her so musch pain...i wonder how they r going to get rid of it... tinking abt it gives me the goosebumps...i pity the woman....
blogged at 7:48 PM
i spend the nite thinking abt myself...again...haiz... mayb i tok too much...haha...mayb u just belonged to a caterory tat says anti- regina...tis six letters make u feel like u wana puke huh?or isit just bcoz u dun like me so u just felt tat all i say or do is simply worong...there is no why?i just to feel tat way towards somone else too... mayb u r just the fruit of the seed tat i have planted years ago...
i have nothing much to say liaoz..later will b the gathering at seoul garden... dun u feel tat wat is between us is affecting the group...we might have to be together for abt 2 years... in the past,i duno abt now,u dun like ppl like jesse n xinying...but u still can carry out normal conversations with them...rite now, i tink u cant even bring urself to look at me in my face.... really tat bad?
i dun expect all to like me... there is a saying tat goes someting like tis... hate for a reason.... wat is it tat u dun like abt me? i currently can onli tink of tis few which i will summarise....
1. ong keng guan - u dun like me tokkign to him or u simply feel tat i m more at ease with him than u....let me tell u tis ok, i m not...
2. i tok too much - u dun like my comments on certain tings...but they were just my views...u have every right to listen n forget of them..
3. attitude problem - serously speaking...ppl ard me always tell me i have got an attitude problem...isit bcoz i bo hiews?or wat?if u tink i have got so serious a prob...at least tell me...
4. u feel tat i m in the limelight more than u - mayb with all the nicknames n my blurness it made u feel uneasy?
5. mayb it was all waishful tinking on my part...u din even treat me as a fren b4? i was the one who trusted u...u never trusted me b4?
6. i am simply plain lazy while u r hardworking...u do all the stuff....
7. i got no concept of time... (ever watch b4 beach boys... i m like sorimachi..i dun liek to look at time...it binds me...)
8. i m not as mature as u... mayb u tin k tat u r moore mature than me... u have been thru more?
9. u simply hate me... no reason...
i cant tink of anymore..... maybe u might wan to fill me in... mayb many other factors have led to tis situation today... i just want to let u know tat, when
the both of us r at cold war, it affects the rest of the group... its like they cant tok to both of us at the same time...it may not be tough on u but i feel it is tough on them... i duno how they feel...
oops...i m running late again....havent change n stuff...hope tat the gathering later will b a success... may my prayer be answered...
i am really getting sick of tis...y is there bad tings in tis world... mayb i should change my tinking...dun tink tat everyone is good...i should have defense on evryone...but tat is so tiring......wat is the best way.... human relationships....now i understand y there r so many so called xin li che yan... it is actaulli catch hold of ppl who dun understand themselves...after they take the test, they will tink n mayb assume the results as themselves when at times they r not....
bloggie, thanks for listening me...watever i say u simply will not oppose n u have no comments on anyting tat i say...if onli u were human...but... humans have EMOTIONS...and r strongly held by them..it is onli with emotions do humans learn how to love...but sadly, they also lkearn how to hate...
blogged at 10:25 AM
I came to realise someting..u cant pls the world...actually i knew long ago...just tat i din wan to accknoledge it...haiz...maybe the fate is over...tat y?mayb she just suddenly feel tat she din like me anymore?mayb she buay song me in some way?mayb i tok too much?there r just too many maybes...i will never know until she tells me...anyway,i tink i simply have to accept it as a fact ba...
blogged at 1:59 AM
Monday, August 25, 2003
today is a really long day...so long tat it sucks to the core...i wonder wat is wrong...m i tat detestable?my name also cant be mentioned?haiz....didi i owe u anyting in my past live?is my life really so interesting tat u wana noe....it's like i have no interest oin ur blog ore watso ever....y r u so interested in mine?haven t u heard b4 curiousity kills the cat.... being too curious ois never good for one...esp if sometings r meant tnot to be known.........if u wana see rite....see all u want ba....
i feel really bad.... really sorry...actualli i feel sorry more than i feel angry or anyting...when we first started this group, family ting, we said we will be tyhe most united....will not b like the oter groups...but now there r cracks....creaks after someting if not mended willbecome holes...holes will gow bigger and spiol the whole ting...
u guys r always sandwiched btw .....i m sorry...being sandwiched is really a badf feeling...its like left n right r dead ends...
actualli bloggie...i have been thinking so much today tat i duno how to tell u...tell u wat i feel at first or after wat i tot over and ponder over...there r so many tings tat i tot of today...maybe...type 1 hr also cant finish...
i tell u wat ahppen today hao le....today huiyi brought to sch her hp tat her dad bought for her...dun seeem sad abt it anymore....today ohana fav past time was to take pics....of someone...haiz... its like idiot also also can see...take until ppl siamz the hp...i tink he has really good tolerance n patience...i tink if me, i would have just gone up n shouted pai gou le mei you....
today from mrg someone jiu weird weird liaoz... if it is bcoz of wat is in the blog...then so sad...i never wanted to let u know...is u want to know wan...dso dun blame me...blame urself....u can also say is bcos now intrnet is freedom of speech....u can wriote anyting u wan abt me.,i can also write anyting abt u..
today jon side also liek got big topic for them to discuss....its abt jon... duno details but anna choong sid someting v true...if u call heror tok to her fac to face, she will noe tat u r weak...cos of ur facial expressions n stuff... i find att quite true...duno i how long never lose appitite liaoz...today from i wake up till lunch,.i never eat/drink anyting...then lunch eat ban mee...i onli eat abit....wah.,..like tat u must be feeling v honoured tat i actaulli lost appiteite over u....haiz...then later brak u all eat agin...but i no appitte still cos i was stilll tinking over wat has happen...tinking wat went wrong...the onli ting tat can make tings change so sudden should be the blog laioz....at dinner, suddenly i realised how hungry i was.... and realised tat actualli wat i was doing made u guys worry.... sorry...again...then later b4 maths,me like got gastric...haiz...i should not be so ji dong....make myself suffer onli....zi tao ku chi....duno for wat....
now tat the day has ended, u went off earlier...but do u noe tat i can onli tink of one ting, u r scared to b with just me n anna isit? u really cant stand me
till cant even see my face for an additional few mins mah?
as i alked back home, i wonder....i already ahte coming to sch laioz....coming to sch n learn is such a tiring ting for me laioz....dun make it worse for me...wa is it tat u dun like abt me?say out lah....if i can change i will change....
i know i cant pls everone... may it is just tat our fate has ended.... but tmr is celebarte birthday...i really hope tmr will go smopthly.... i will pray..... may my prayers be answered!
blogged at 11:02 PM
to the ger who is driving me nuts... - at first, i tot u n i were in the same boat...we were stressing over the someting e same... GUYS..then later,i came to know tat u went to tell someone else tat i was always tokking too much abt him...but now..after we been thru e war,u now keep telling me abt the guy u like esp when it is just me n u alone..isit bcoz there r now no topics btw us?but when u tok so much abt him,should i also complain tat u r tokking too much abt him?but...when u like someone,he's always on the mind...so dun blame someone in love tat she is tokking too much...cos love make s one blind..
u should noe it beter than anyone tat once i say enuff i will stop...we used to share alot of secrets...so many tat now i m afraid u will spill them out...mayb u already did...is it bcoz we have too many similarities tat y we fell out? i should have known...but i wanted to trust u again..but u din want my trust...all u wanted was to ruin me isit?y?m i tat worth for u to ruin?is it bcoz i m able to get more attention than u?is tat y u said i was a drama queen?but do u noe tat at times u r having more attention then me?cos i lack of one most impt ting...tears...tat y i call myself teary...to make up the tears...i lost in quarrels cos i duno how to cry....sometinmes i wonder isit bcoz i m too boy boy...but then again it also shows tat i m not weak...mayb to u i m a drama queen...but wat i tell u all is truth...cos i know tat once one start to lie,u have to remember ur lie n use another to cover up...it is too tiring...i have limited energy...over use of energy will make me sick...i noe tat too well to hurt myself...
i relli wana noe wat u dun like me....isit bcoz of him?will u be hapi if i dun metion his name n not tok to him,dun even see him?i tried tat for a period of time...but tat apprantly din have any effect on our frenship...it kinda strained it worse...was it bcos when tat hapen,u din have any news on him?i noe tat u r always using me to get his nes, but i dun blame u...cos tat is human...always making use of each other... i dun deny,cos i m human n i do tat too..so i m in no postiton to do tat...
if u reali wana noe my blog,i can let u noe...cos wat i post here is true...u just have to ask...not sneak behind me n remember my blog's url..there is no need for u to stoop low...i duno if tis post will piss anyone,but i need to get it out...like i say...wat u read here, dun say it out...
blogged at 12:58 AM
tio scolding again...y m i so lazy tis days?just now i tried to do maths...but cant even do a qn...jia lat...i understand how to do wan...anna just explain...but...when i alone...i cant do...die laioz...
now i tink back n wonder..he was rite...y did i enter tis course in a fit of anger...i should have gone for buciness or tourism...should have bo hiews abt ntuc job n just go for the interview...it concerns my future..now i m here suffering...i should hav listen to him...dun b stubborn..tink i very smart...actuali...i m the dumbest...i m really sorry i din listen to u...i now tat u wanted to help me walk on a right track...but...i m sorry....if u were to ever see tis,pls let me noe...but i doubt u will ever see tis...now i noe wat is call must listen to others...LISTEN BEFORE U ACT...
now tokking to anna...abt huiyi n the process lab report and crap of cos..haha...i m DARN SICK N TIRED OF TIS...freak...like i go sch is to xiao keak her like tat...wat the hell does she wan from me...didi i owe her someting in my past life?or she owe me?everyone in ohana is having a bad time over tis...esp cuijie n anna...i feel reali sorry...i have been sandwiched in btw b4 so i noe...it reali sucks...like help one side like unfair to the other...cant dun help...n cant just help one side...i dun wan tat to hapen..but u just dun seem to like me isit?Y? do u wana just tell me?i noe i m not reali tat good a person...i dun have time concept..always fooling ard...not like u so serious...me got attitude pob..i duno wat's my attitude prob...but alot of ppl just say i do...so do u wana enlighten me abt it?since u say i have?
y cant u just tell me in the face and let it b over...i tried to forget abt tis..but...y must u always remind me abt it...do u noe tat it is v tiring when u dunno whether anot to like or to hate tis person?maybe to u all tis seem to come naturally...but to me...like someone is tiring,hating is even worse...i forget tings easily...n i need constant revision,or unless someting or someone reminds me abt it...so even if i dun like u bcoz of someting,if u dun do anyting to me,i will not dun like u or watever..i will just be neutral..
someone once said...even my character is like boy...i forget easily...i dun have the mind of a woman..which is bad for me...cos i dun remember..he said the onli part where i m like a girl is i like to fuss over ppl...take care of them...u noe y?is becoz i like to see ppl smile..but he will never noe...n will onli tink tat i m a caring buddy...to each n every1 of u....but the truth is i wanted to see u smile even more...why r u where i needed u the most?haiz... i need ur guidance...to guide me out of tis...when i had problems with the other guys,u always solve them for me...now i m having probs not with guys but gers...now i noe y u told me to mx ard more n be closer to gers than to u guys...u seem to be alwasy planning for me...but i just simply tot tat u were just too worried for noting...i was wrong...darn hell wrong...
blogged at 12:36 AM
Sunday, August 24, 2003
bloggie!yesterday was a very hapi day sia..in the mrg i help fadrizal bring riverside students...the 4(5) class very cute sia...got one attitude guy...but quite caring and xi xin :P ...tat class very interesting..then attitude guy brother was nyp guitar club pres...and duno wat...he say he will be coming to nyp..so i say i look forward to seeing him..then his fren say he mayb might not make it... he say he will k his fren if he din make it here...so funi...
then got one fella always walk v slow...haiz...no time liaoz still walk so slow...tell me he dun like to walk fast...haiyo...he look so atlethic tell me he dun like to walk fast...
suddenly one guy tell me his bro is in bp mentoring (nyp) i ask is it kenny..haha...cos he look like him...then the bro...forget wat name..say i like kenny isit..OMG..no lah...then say can give me kenny hp no...haiz...wat is going thru their minds...b4 they left, they wanted to take pic...with me n fad...but fad shy lah...hehe..so in the end never take... cos the bus arrived..n they were late..
i went home feeling so tired...they like so energy...always all for one one for all... all take stairs...like cant seperate...when ask them to take lift they started playing with the camera...doing lots of silly faces..i bring them walk behind the SCL lab there.. haha..i send they all up then i went up with the last guys and the teacher...all stuck out side cos no card...hehe...all waiting for me onli...
the other happy event for yest was kelvin's birthday chalet...they rented a two rider bicycle overnight so it was like, everyone started playing...i rode twice...then i realised tat cycling need so much energy...haha..first time was with dad,he seat in front..then he keep me n himself all in balance..then he let me cycle for a while,while he just keep balanceing...very fun..next was with doreen...she din reali had alot of control,so we were like wobbly...make me even more scared..so i jsut keep cycling...scared them all sia...when we two din know how to brake...so failure...I MUST LEARN HOW TO RIDE BICYCLE BY TIS YEAR!
arghhhh...yest tio suan until like siao..every kid know how to ride...onli ME..ONLI ME!haiz....
blogged at 12:17 PM
Saturday, August 23, 2003
ok...now i change name liaoz...hehe... this blog is going to be private..
blogged at 1:41 AM
i just reached home from yishun...v tired...tmr still going to sch at abt 8 plus...help fadrizal with the bringing riverside sec sch students ard NYP..sianz...but he got help me b4...must help him back...today suddenly huiyi cried...is she too stress or wat?dad buy hp also must cry....i tink she tink too much liaoz...take things one step at a time lor...y be so bothered... guess she will say me abt my bo hiews behavior again...but she duno tat last time i hiew alot...too mush for my own good...bo hiews no good mah?save u hell lot of trouble u noe...but i guess to her it's just attitude prob... as if she dun have... everyone has lor... just accept it or be pissed by it... haha...bloggie actualli i noe i got attitude prob...but...having attitude is better than no attitude...they alwasy say, having attitude then is COOL...haha...today i ask ohana y they always got so many nick name for me... mich say is cos me KAWAII...haiz...if i cute the sky will drop down...haha...sometimes i wonder if i m here to bring laughter to ppl...from last time till now... ppl ard me always will laugh...Y ah?r they realli happy or?.... hehe... (k guy nick on msn= our debate topic) i feel tired liaoz... shld b going slp soon..hehe...
blogged at 1:28 AM
Thursday, August 21, 2003
watching qian nu yu hun on Ch u now...daniel chan is so cute...hehe...teh show like v interesting... die liaoz lah... my schedule everyday is come home, watch tv, play com , sleep...just now mum shouted at me again...say electricity bill went up again...bcoz oif my late nights on the com...haiz.... my business again...y dun she say is cos mich n jos one person on tv one on com?misch use for how long also dun get scolding....just bcoz she is dad's apple of the eye.... tis is so unfair..........KAOZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
blogged at 11:31 PM
Today the maths test was so jialat...tot i got the tips liaoz...but turn out the question was kinda different... haiz...anyway, today study till quite late... then i at one point was so tired, i just went to toilet...hoping to catch a wink...but they all like v shocked tat i wanted to catch a wink in toilet...but tat was the quietest place i can find... KK sitting in front of me wat... so how... got loud speaker so i definitely must go hide lah... actuallly based on theory i should not be so tired wan... must be today use too much brain juice, at qwek heat n mass tutorial... he realli a nice guy... but i tink he must find me a ver blur ger...hehe... but i m like tat wan lah... hehe...then maths the first qn i tried to figure ut myself.... i starting to tink tat i not tat dun understand... is i duno how to apply and i duno how to do... haiz... so many problem... duno wat to do sia.. so jialat... then at nitez walk out of nyp tat time, i walk the fountain nearly fall down... haha..give the cleaner (i tink) see.. so ma lu.... realli hope to not onli walk fast but fly away.... then huiyi n anna walking with me...then k guy they all in front...so huiyi like dun wana walk fastcared they tink we wana catch up with them...but i tink ok wat...classmates cant tok mah?but actualli i need to do alot of ting at home...wat's more i realli tired...but to be able to get out of sch made me reali happy i realli hate school(studying lah)...hehe...then we meet k guy they all at yck mrt..then i shouted bye bye... wee hock tmr O level oral... his reading reminds me of someone.. haha... always pausing at the wrong places...then when hear someone read better than him get pai pai... then the leonard like read so fast...he more scared...haha..
blogged at 10:48 PM
din noe tat anna and k guy had their own hidden side... onli when at times then will come out... haha... me also...ok ok... i admit it...actually i m always sad...the laughter at times is fake at times is real.. oh ya... we started tokking together cos anna paste wrong haha... aso i lazy lah... must maintaion so many windows...actualli k guy is quite good at tokking wan...haha...anna also...they both good at zha ppl.. tmr maths test....sianz... mysteroz just told me he got jack tan n a qwek for his maths... give him open book test somemore... haiz... so good...anyway tell u bloggie,when i see huiyi study, it realli freaks me out!!!!haha feel so much better! bloggie, i hafnt study leh... wat's worse is tat i dun understand a ting... last sem at least understand the english...now they like talking arabic, spanish itailian ,french,i going crazy liaoz....
blogged at 3:24 AM
now we (anna me k guy) have been talking crap alot... haha...quite fun...though the drifting and left out feeling is back though... esp when at irc...when they tok abt some stuff...tat feeling... i hate it...anyway back to k guy... he like more open in msn... haha... but maybe is i tok too much so he have to reply? but even anna also tok more...should have more of tis..haha..
blogged at 3:12 AM
Wednesday, August 20, 2003
My life is in such a mess now..i feel like i m being forced to the edge of a cliff..one more step back n i will fall...there are so many tings in life tat r not smooth sailing..there are so many problems i have...everyone has... yet i have no outlet yet...i need to breathe...but i cant yet..there are so many tings left undone...
blogged at 11:58 PM
ok... i see my first msg liaoz...duno if ppl can see...haiz..just read finish someting...find it lame...haha..anyway i miss my sec sch frenz...after tat big quarrel over nandeska chalet...like drift away from them... i am like drifting away from everyone... m i building a wall or is others starting to build a wall?
blogged at 11:45 PM
testing testing 123
blogged at 11:42 PM
